In what kind of bed/surrounding do you sleep best? Do you have a "safe haven" fantasy?

I think people should stop talking about sex after they had children, unless the children are completely detached. People should indulge in abstinence (especially oraly) when they're raising children.

Juliane

The fantasy is to be safe everywhere.

Dens

Please explain. How is your sister?

Talking about sex in front of your children sounds to me like "Yes, we made you, but we're trying to make something better". Of course that isn't what they're saying, but it sounds like that on a subconscient level. I'd like to have some children, but I wouldn't want to raise them, I think. Yesterday, when I wrote this, it was all so clear in my head, but today's cloudy.

My sister's fine again. She performed on stage yesterday. She's been dancing Flamenco for three years now. She starred as this woman with a big skirt. It was beautiful.

Dens

The children (25 and 27) were not present.

That's a good thing. I remember this one time. I was in the board of a theatregroup (small-scale) and the chairman was an ex-teacher of mine. He had teached me when I was 10 and again when I was 12 (4th and 6th grade). I knew his son and daughter and at one time we had had a meeting with wine and some boardgames (yes, we liked to do that). The converstation soon diverted to sex (as it always does) and it was quite odd to hear him talk about sex.

For one because he had been my teacher once, and secondly because I knew his children. Not long after that I quitted the board.

Dens

Even people in their seventies still have sex. Imagine an eighty year old caressing her partner in the home for the elderly. I think that's really something to look out for.

Dens

Wanting children and not wanting to raise them, you sound like an excellent candidate for donation.

Mieke

As I understood from my grandmother, competition and jealousy in her home for the elderly was pretty fierce: just a few (likeable) men and plenty of women.

I'd rather not think about sex and elderlies.

What in your opinion is the best ratio for essential to repetition, whether it concerns dinner, lovemaking or writing?

Marie

I don't get your question.

Dens

Just wait.

e.g. out of every 6 courses, how many do you need, per 6 lovemakings, how many do you wish to remember 30 years later, out of 6 phrases you write, how many can you not do without? I just realised it's a rather personal question, and therefore, perhaps a bit besides the point, but there you go, I hope this explains it.

Dens

http://www.healthline.com/hlvideo/sex-and-the-elderly-woman

Mr. Arnon

Wait for what? When I worked in Turkey an elderly woman (in her 70s) showed interest in me and when I worked in Benidorm an English elder woman (Norma was her name) massaged me.

They never spoke about their children and that's fine. Norma told me about her friend who was Robbie Williams' mother, but she didn't give any clues about her having children.

But that's probably another story.

Interesting debate, Mieke.

Dens

What you say according to (talking about) sex and raising children sounds insane.

Hanny

Could you please elaborate on that, Hanny?

Maybe all of us here should meet, say 40 years from now, for some group sex. Who’s up for it? (no need for condoms but do bring your dentures along) Afterwards we could talk about our unfulfilled dreams, married, unmarried, children, no children,you know, compare notes..that should be quite entertaining and a welcome distraction from on-line Bingo no?

Dens

I hope to understand that your comments are partly ironic, and cloudy.
You are saying a few things:
you don't want parents to talk about sex
you don't want them to have sex in front of the children
you dislike elderly ladies talking about their grown-up children while attempting to have sex with you or giving you a massage.
you don't want parents to have sex
you think that if children know or see that their parent feel sexually attracted to eachother it will cause a subconscious feeling of rejection.

Marie

Three courses are usually enough for me.

My father and his new girlfriend (both 80) are in love as debutant teenagers.
Next to them I feel I am the older, more experienced person.

Marie

Count me in.

Arnon

I can imagen you wouldn't pick the writing, but why not the ovulating woman?

Mieke

The thought of the elderly making love is indeed touching. Unfortunately I suffer from a recurring nightmare involving dentures becoming entangled in pubic hair.

@Marie
Leave me out, please.