Exile?

It's a trait left over from the Dutch colonial period. You aren't exiled. You're conquering new territory. The problem now, like back then, is it's unclear to whom to report.

Some quote’s on, and people in exile (and recently, on TV again, Exile On Main Street!)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exile

Romanticizing exile

There is a temptation to romanticize almost any kind of suffering which goes particularly well with what we think about writers. Just imagine Hilde Domin writing all those bittersweet poems during her time in the Dominican Republic.
And if those who have to live in exile romanticize it, it might be just a way of coping. I heard a talk a few weeks ago about how people make their own happiness in the absence of choice. Not only do they come to terms with their situation but even feel genuinely happy about their lot and decry what they cannot have. The lecturer concluded that artificial happiness seems to be every bit as good as real happiness.

Juliane

So the lecturer is saying that artificial happiness can produce real happiness (and real happiness is as good as real happiness)?

Childhood

As an exile (at first involuntary, now voluntary), I wonder what defines my exilism. I suppose it is the realization that I will never be at home in the Netherlands. The lack of a "home" makes me nostalgic for my childhood, and a society in which I have a right to acceptance (not that I was). But this is an illusion. Woody Allen said "When I gave up hoping I felt a lot better." I think when I give up the idea of "home" I will feel a lot better.

Carlos

Well, yes. His point is that the happiness you trigger yourself for want of choice feels the same as the happiness you get naturally. Most people would say that the former is nothing but self-deception.

Juliane

Perhaps happiness is almost always self-deception?

And yes, there is a good chance that if you delude yourself you are happy you will be happy.

Carlos

I'm afraid so. This is good on one side because one doesn't feel like being at the world's mercy so much. On the other side it's really annoying because my mother would be so often right when saying "Stell dich nicht so an!" (don't make a fuss).

Arnon

You seem to regret your choice to bring up the subject of exile during public interviews. Perhaps you should come to terms with the fact that you are a part-time self-seducer.

@ Juliane and Carlos

I think the question is whether your ultimate goal is happiness.
If it is, why question the method by which you got there? As long as you end up happy.
If your aim is not happiness but, for instance, leading a meaningful life, than artificial happiness might just be a lack of progression towards your real goal (e.g. to be meaningful).

people in exile,allready came a long way,i think romanticizing is to soft for them
i think passion (restrained or expressed ) is in their hearts and minds until it get oppressed
we're so spoiled

Simon Nak

Could you define "a meaningful life"?

Juliane

You should tell your mother that her acceptance of your unhappiness will make you happy.

Juliane

Exile is often romanticized by those who are not forced to live in exile – that’s what makes it disturbing.
And yes, almost all suffering has been romanticized at one point or the other.

@ag

yeah, avoid it, you are not walking in the shoes of exile

Steve

To the best of my knowledge the Dutch aren’t colonizing New York.
I would even say that the Jews aren’t colonizing New York.
And I would like to state that also the Germans aren’t colonizing New York.
But if you think that I’m conquering new territory I take this as an invitation to conquer you.

Arnon

Funny you mention your three identities: Jewish, Dutch and German. Are you trying to suppress something? The little messiah/fuhrer in you wishes to colonize New York?

Colonialism is essentially tribalism. What tribe do you belong to?

Carlos

Are you talking to me?

Laast worden van het gesneuvelede.

"U wordt uitgenodigd.
Ik woon dicht bij groene bergen.
Als je langskomen..."

Of course Holland is not colonizing America now.
No sense in damaging one's rental property

Uitgenodigd

Your books are in my house. already, so you're winning already.
Don't expect Holland or others to colonize now: Why damage rental property?