Arnon Grunberg
Words Without Borders

The Psychological Equivalent of...

The Psychological Equivalent of a Piping-Fresh Krispy Kreme Doughnut

There are times when I feel as if I know absolutely nothing about American culture, despite the fact that I have been living in New York for eleven years.
I felt this way, for example, while reading John Leonard’s review of Rick Moody’s last novel, The Diviners, in The New York Review of Books.
The feeling started as I was reading the first paragraph, where John Leonard claims that Mr. Moody has turned into something about which one has take a position, “like stem cell research.”
I didn’t know that this was obligatory. I have taken no position on Mr. Moody, and I would like to keep it that way if only for the fact that I haven’t read anything by Mr. Moody, except maybe a review or two.
For the record, I have never expressed any strong opinions on stem cell research, neither in public nor in my private life.
A few paragraphs later, Mr. Leonard quotes Mr. Moody on the Krispy Kreme doughnut.
I have never eaten a Krispy Kreme doughnut. I’m not able to tell the difference between a plain doughnut from, let’s say, Dunkin’ Donuts and the Krispy Kreme variety.
Mr. Leonard claims that the Krispy Kreme stores turn on red lights when their doughnuts are “piping-fresh.” At first, I thought that the red light was Mr. Leonard’s benign attempt at satire. A red-light-district for doughnuts, well, yeah, even the Italian comedian Roberto Benigni wouldn’t sink that low.
But then it got to me that, in reality, Krispy Kreme actually might turn on their red lights when everything is all piping-fresh inside the store.
I enjoyed Mr. Leonard’s review tremendously. Reading it is recommended.
I cannot say that it awakened in me the desire to buy Mr. Moody’s novel, but that doesn’t have to be a problem.
Mr. Leonard’s best line: “If this is PoMo, some of us would rather sing the blues.” This can be used at every social occasion. When the silence is too uncomfortable, just say to the lady next to you, “If this is PoMo, some of us would rather sing the blues.” I tried it. It works. It brings something out in people. Let’s call it the psychological equivalent of the piping-fresh Krispy Kreme doughnut.


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