2007/09/13 New York
On spitting
The advantages of stiffness
On the eve of Jewish New Year (one of my Jewish friends wrote me: “Anyway I am not sure if it is appropriate or not but I did want to wish you a very happy and healthy New Year.” That’s what you get when you are not religious, people hesitate to wish you a happy New Year) I went to the offices of Penguin to discuss the publication of “The Jewish Messiah” in the USA.
(There are small differences between let’s say my publisher based in Switzerland and the publisher in the US. The biggest difference is that in New York you have to show your picture ID to get permission to enter the premises.)
My agent was present, the publisher, the associate publisher and the publicist.
I would describe the atmosphere as friendly but stiff. Stiffness has its advantages. It’s not going to happen that I have to tour in 2008 with a goat through the city of New York in order to promote my book as I did in the Netherlands in 2003. (For a different novel.)
Before the end of the meeting I managed to summarize Mr. Coetzee’s last novel (he’s published by Penguin but the book has not come out yet in the US) badly. Socrates had strong arguments for spoken language, but the advantage of the written language is not to be overlooked. You have time to think about what you are going to say. And of course, as mentioned in one of my earlier books, you will never accidentally spit on somebody when you use written language.
My career would have gone in a different direction when I had managed on strategic moments to not spit on certain people.
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39 comments 
Entertainment stuff
Compliments to that cover designer... Or maybe this was your own idea, I don't know.I didn't understand much of the book (I sort of worked my way through it anyway though, because I was on a beach in Eilat and the book was the only entertainment stuff I had with me that a) I didn't already finish on the plane or b) went off working all the time, leaving me all alone with The Jewish Messiah) but probably enough to say; great cover!
Jewish New Year
I skipped tonight's New Year's dinner, which Laura and I had been invited to, in favor of a chance to see the Herzog movie "The enigma of Kaspar Hauser" in a local movie theater.I was fascinated by Kaspar Hauser as a child, and he still gives me the shivers.
career
A fierce pelican! Nice cover.If you did not had the guts to spit on certain people, what direction could your career have gone to? An office clerk? A human waist manager of a bicycle repair man?
Stiff upper lips (also spit)
I agree that at some times there's an advantage to a certain stiffness. When applying for a job for instance. I always feel awkward in these stiff, overcourteous situations. And that makes the other feel awkward, which strangely enough plays in my advantage.I often get apolgies for their strange behaviour.
stiffness
Mostly I prefer some stiffness over the charade of a would be spontaneous jolly good fellow. Stiffness can hide a dark promise of weird humour, maybe that is why I prefer British comedy over USA comedy.@ Eva
I think you can read that novel on different levels. I for example read it as a parable that every messianic ambition leads to a lot of bloodshed. Don't you shiver when you hear Bush talk about the HOLY war on terror and the axes of EVIL.@ Arnon
I thought the pelican had disappeared from the cover, now I see that it's a drawing of that bird. Nice.I wish you the book to be a succes in the english spoken world.
Cover
Seeing as everyone's commenting on how lovely the cover is, I'd like to say I personally don't like it at all. I'm even doubting whether it will appeal to an international audience, it will certainly catch their attention more than a goat will though.@ Noa
The cover reminds me of the american eagle.Kaspar Hauser - behaviour
@Oscar WildeRecently we had a new colleague; she is sensitive and intelligent but slightly autistic. It is revealing to look at our own behaviour and emotions and hers. It is disgusting to know how many tease and despise her for reacting a little differently. It was astounding to realise that almost nobody knew anything about for example autism. If you do not treat her as an oddity to mock with, she blossoms from time to time.
Cover revisited
The more I think of it, the more I think you're cover is good. Precisely because I'm still thinking of it. Doesn't mean I like it, but that's not the point is it?@Mieke, stop playing stupid, the cover obviously creates an immediatie association with the Nazi eagle for more reasons than only the colouring and not the American eagle. You as an artist shouldn't be so afraid to say it as it is.
To all
You guys out there seem to not know certain symbols.By all means this is the German eagle.
See also: http://www.ngw.nl/int/dld/duitslan.htm
PS
Or to be more precise: a pelican disguised as German eagle.Is it the first time you have a book published with pinguin? Sorry for asking , but I am too lazy to click all the titles in oeuvre section
Arnon
Are you satisfied with Mr Garrett's translations?Oscar W
I’m very satisfied with Sam Garrett’s translations. Do you disagree?By the way, speaking about Jewish New Year, are you Jewish or do you have Jewish friends?
I know this not a decent question to ask, we should avoid discussing religion and sex in public, but I’m addicted to these topics.
Any more thoughts on desire?
Your name looks like part of the title. Really good design.
Dens
My name is part of the design. This jacket is why my parents gave me this name.Mieke,
I don't believe you are lazy, but yes, it's the first book published by Penguin.
I don't believe you are lazy, but yes, it's the first book published by Penguin.
Arnon
Laura is Jewish. Several weeks ago, she expressed a desire to make matzah ball soup for you. My best Jewish friend is Michael, who recently moved to Scotland.I haven't read any of your books in English translation. I wanted to make sure that you are fully satsfied with Mr Garrett's work because I wouldn't want to disappoint Laura's grandmother.
I agree that desire operates in a marketplace, and that we are subject to this marketplace. Laura and I appreciate your desire for us, and we want to let you know that we desire you too.
Oscar W
The fact Laura is Jewish makes things even more complicated; now my mother is going to be involved I’m afraid. All she longs for is a Jewish daughter-in-law. At least that’s what she claims.Arnon
Laura and I beg you to keep your mother out of this.Oscar W
Please tell Laura that my mother is something that is beyond my control.Arnon
Is there anything that we can do to limit the damage?Practical
Oscar,Wouldn't it be more practical if Laura starts posting comments here? Or is this less exciting for everyone involved?
Oscar W
Could you explain what you mean exactly with damage in this particular case? Then I will answer your question.Johannes
I’m convinced that Laura’s grandmother is alive and thriving in the Bronx. (There was yesterday a very interesting article on pawnshops in the Bronx in the NY Times, if you would like to read it I send you the link.) I’m less convinced about Laura’s state of existence. For all I know she could be a dead body in Oscar’s closet, she could have left him four years and three months ago and this is just Oscar’s way to keep her alive. There are many good reasons for Laura’s silence. Her voice might be utterly disappointing as well. Not that my mother would care.Arnon, Johannes
A week ago, after I forwarded her some of Arnon's comments, Laura replied: "How did I get involved in this again? Can you please remind me?".Two days later, she quoted Shakespeare: "Out damn spot". (This was in response to something unrelated to Arnon or this blog.)
Arnon
Laura and I both have the strong intuition that it is unlikely that your mother, of all people, would end up making a positive contribution to our relationship. More generally, we are weary of complications.Of course, it's possible that your mother's desire for Laura would increase my desire for Laura just as it appears to have increased your desire for Laura.
oscar w
What kind of opinions do Laura and you hold about my mother? I hasten to say that I’m not easily offended on behalf of my mother.I’m not sure if I got the Shakespeare-quote right. Should I read spot as in “place” or “point” – or should I think of a pimple?
By the way has Laura ever read any of my books? Or does she prefer to be desired by an author whose works she has left unread. This would give her the opportunity to fantasize bout my work in the same way as I fantasize about Laura.
Arnon
Laura says that Jewish mothers bring with them a certain level of guilt and high expectations, and a high likelihood of forcefeeding fatty food.In one of your short stories, your mother is introduced wearing a raincoat on a sunny day. This did not leave such a good impression with me. Is there anything that you could say about your mother that would make us feel more at ease?
Arnon
I gave Laura a copy of Phantom Pain last fall. I'm afraid that she hasn't started reading it yet. Interestingly, the book has been on her night table all this time.Recently, I acquired a second copy of Phantom Pain for Laura's grandmother.
The full story
Oscar,What are you saying, that's she's mentally ill?
Maybe it is a good idea that you tell the full story or that Laura starts commenting on a daily basis, because you might censor Laura's statements.
I assure you, after three weeks your relationship with Laura will be stronger.
To make you, Laura and Arnon more comfortable with that new situation I won't be commenting directly at you guys. Maybe Dens jumps in once and awhile, but he is not very dangerous. He's busy hitting on Ilanit in the other room.
And now don't start saying: 'Laura and I don't think it's a good idea...etc.etc.' or other nonsense.
Oscar
My mother is not only fairly aggressive but also highly original (from time to time) without trying hard. She hates fatty food; she is very much into fresh fruit. Laura’s assessment that her expectations are high is correct, but this is not necessarily a threat or something negative. In general my expectations are high as well.The fact that Laura has a copy of one of my novels next to her pillow is a sign. What this sign is telling us, is not clear to me, but a sign it is.
P.S. Wearing a raincoat on a sunny day (do you remember which story it was?) is nothing to be fearful of. I once had a girlfriend who had beautiful raincoat (yellow with flowers) and I urged her to wear it as often as possible -- also on sunny days.
Arnon
Your comments about your mother, in particular those concerning fresh fruit, have reassured me. Suspicion has made way for desire, a desire to get to know your mother. I feel a certain unease about the combination of aggression and raincoats, but I'll get over this.Laura would like to know if your mother's high expectations extend to your friends and acquaintances. She says that having one Jewish mother is enough.
The short story about your mother took place in Hinterzarten, if I remember correctly. Shakespeare's "spot" is a metaphorical blood spot.
Oscar w
My mother holds the belief dear that no woman is good enough for me. So reassure Laura, whenever Laura will be introduced to my mother as a possible marriage-candidate my mother will find all kind of shortcomings in Laura. My mother is particularly adept at pointing out the physical shortcomings of women.She happens to do the same with her own grandchildren. This is something I have to add to her defense.
PS Is this site to you and Laura a bloody spot?
PPS Is it possible that the Story of my Baldness is a better way of introducing myself to Laura than Phantom Pain?
Arnon
Laura deals well with unwarranted comments on her physique. Her other grandmother, who is blind, always claims that Laura put on weight. This has triggered Laura to say: "Grandma, just imagine me skinny".I was unaware that "The story of my baldness" is available in translation. I have promptly ordered a used copy. I find consolation in rehabilitating rejected books.
We prefer your blog to Shakespeare, at least for the moment.
Oscar
Maybe Laura will prefer the Baldness to Phantom Pain. What’s Laura’s relationship to Shakespeare exactly?And if Laura’s grandmother has problems seeing, how exactly is she going to read my book? Does she have somebody who reads aloud for her?
Arnon
Laura's relationship to Shakespeare is not exactly that of a devout reader.I should elaborate on Laura's grandmothers. I'm planning to send a copy of one of your works to Laura's seeing grandmother, who lives in the Bronx. Laura has another grandmother who is blind. This grandmother has a habit of making unfounded comments regarding Laura's physical appearance.
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