Arnon Grunberg

My guy


Last night, around 11 o’clock, I discovered a leak in my toilet.
I immediately called an emergency plumber, but the emergency plumber told me: “Call your super, and put some towels on the floor.” My super was nowhere to be found, but I did put some towels on the floor.
This morning I called the emergency plumber again.
Around 10:30 a.m. a handsome man arrived who claimed to be a plumber and an electrician. He took a quick look at my toilet and he said: “ My guy needs to fix this.”

The guy arrived at 3 p.m.
The guy looked like a Russian spy in an American movie.
He worked on my toilet for about thirty minutes, then he said: “There is another leak, shall I fix that as well?”

“Fix all the leaks you can find,” I answered.

It’s not often that I treat myself to a plumber who looks like a Russian spy.
After another ten minutes the plumber said: “I’m done now, I’m going, but my boss will come in a few minutes and ask you for money.”

Indeed, after five minutes the first plumber knocked on my door, charged me $435.50 and left my apartment with the words: “Call me again.”

All in all, this was a pretty pleasant experience.